An important lesson in gratitude

Hi there,

This will probably be one of the hardest posts I’ve ever written and I expect it will take me quite a while to write it as there will be some emotions flying around. Last Wednesday, 2nd August 2017 I held a free web presentation on how to start feeling a little better every day. During that presentation I passed on one of the most important things that I pass on to all of my clients……….. the power and emotion of gratitude.

What I said…………………

As I do with all my clients I talked about how consciously feeling grateful every day can help you to feel a little better every day – it’s a scientific fact that the human body, mind and nervous system cannot feel fear (anxiety) and gratitude at the same time.

For this reason I ask people …… if you could, what would you be grateful for in your life right now? It doesn’t have to be something big, it can be something small like being grateful for waking up this morning because some people around the world didn’t and their family and friends have to deal with that.

What happened next…………………

After I finished the web presentation and signed off I spent some time with my wife and then we both headed off to bed. The next morning I rose and went through my usual morning routine and while out jogging with my dog I went through my routine of gratitude……………. Which, of course, starts with being grateful for waking up that morning as many people around the world wouldn’t.

What I wasn’t to know was that on that Thursday morning one of my best friends, the man who was Best Man at my wedding, would not wake up from his sleep. While I was being grateful for waking he was quietly passing away and I would never see him again…… taken at just 45 years of age.


Being grateful has never been quite so difficult……………

As I sit here writing this it is now Monday morning, just 5 days since he passed and they have been 5 of the most confusing days of my life as I swing from devastation to remembering the amazing times and memories we created together. The hardest thing of all though has been waking in the morning and being consciously grateful for waking……………. Because my friend, my best man, the man who was like a brother to me did not wake and will not wake.


The important lesson in gratitude is this………………

I have seen, first hand, the trauma that his family is going through and my grief is very little compared to theirs. The one thing I know of my friend is that he would tell everyone to carry on with their lives and be grateful for what they have and so that is what I shall do…………… not just for me but for him as well, I will be grateful for every day that comes my way.


Rest in Peace Mark Perks…………………….. I am eternally grateful for the memories we created together!



About Graham

Graham Nicholls is a Professional Coach, Author and Expert in Human Behavioural Patterns who helps his clients to make their lives better.
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